Many months ago, I interviewed a dating coach for one of the chapters in my book, The Baby Gap. My baby goggles had powerful lenses, unlike the beer variety, which had always been a bit hit and miss.The chapter is called ‘Dating with baby goggles on’ and I wrote a feature on the topic a few years back (NB newspaper headlines and captions are out of my control). They could spot an eligible man from a considerable distance and they zeroed in on an empty ring finger like a precision-guided weapon.
Now 40, single, childless but still hoping to be a mum, I’d taken to looking at every man through baby goggles.
I’d spent my 20s surveying men through beer goggles – through the haze that clouded my vision after a couple of vodka tonics.
But dating as a would-be mother whose fertility window was closing was a whole different story.
Since writing that article, I’ve learned first-hand about the perils of dating with baby angst and done my best to try and stop my imagination from hurtling off like a runaway pram.
Early menopause, blocked tubes,unexplained fertility – these could strike at any age.
Or perhaps you guys are firing blanks – have you thought of that?
There are no guarantees with fertility – it’s like a game of roulette.
So should we put our morals to one side, shave a few years off our age and at least bag ourselves a date with a man who isn’t old enough to be our dad and who would still like to be a father himself?
I’ve also come to terms with the possibility of a life without children or at least I’m on that path.